Whisk mayonnaise, dry mustard, Worcestershire sauce, steak sauce, half-and-half, lemon juice, sriracha, and salt together in a serving bowl until smooth and creamy. Cover and refrigerate.
Preheat the oven to 380 degrees F (190 degrees C). Place pastry shells on a baking sheet.
Bake in the preheated oven until golden brown, about 20 minutes. Allow shells to cool completely.
Meanwhile, melt 1 tablespoon butter in a medium-sized skillet over medium-high heat. Add scallops and saute quickly on both sides until browned, 3 to 5 minutes; do not overcook. Remove from skillet and set aside. Reduce heat to medium and melt remaining butter in the skillet. Add mushrooms and shallots and cook until just tender, 3 to 5 minutes.
Whisk half-and-half and flour together in a bowl and add to the skillet with the mushroom mixture, whisking until smooth and thickened, about 5 minutes. Whisk wine, sherry, lemon juice, and mustard into the cream sauce. Stir in Parmesan cheese, tarragon, and black pepper. Add cooked scallops, stir, and reheat briefly, 1 to 3 minutes.
Cut tops off the pastry shells. Fill with cheesy scallops and place at the bottom of a large horizontal board.
Fill a cocktail shaker with ice. Add gin, vermouth, cherry juice, and bitters. Shake well and strain into 4 shot glasses. Add a cherry to each glass. Position quarterback attack shooters diagonally at the upper left of the board. Place grapes in both the upper and lower left corners of the board.
Place the bowl of creamy mustard dipping sauce on the right side of the board and surround with shrimp and lemon wedges.
Spread about 1/2 tablespoon of goat cheese onto each potato chip, being careful not to break the chips. Add about 1 teaspoon of red pepper jelly to each chip and top with crumbled bacon and a jalapeno slice. Place hot pepper jelly chips above and to the left of the puff pastry shells, filling in any empty space.
